Ever since I was a young girl and I am just going to narrow that down to the first memory of having “A gift” as many would call it, though I used to think of it as more of a curse for the most part growing up. I was eight when I saw my first spirits and got my first visions. I am a tad psychic, I say that because I don’t want others to misunderstand what I mean by it. I do not give out readings, nor do I deal tarot cards. I am a tad because my inner voice is strong and my dreams and visions show and tell me things about the past, present and future. I do not choose which I see, or am given.
My visions come in symbolisms as do dreams. Most dreams are built of in symbolisms, but everything is for me, even my drawings i hear are perceived as such, which doesn’t at all surprise me.
As you all know I am packing and I packed my dream catcher way too early, I know many do not believe in them, but I do. Very strongly, because they have helped me and it does require belief in them to help as well.
Last night I had a bad dream again because I didn’t have my dream catcher which usually slows them down, or lessens their strength. If you understand what I mean by that. I had a warning dream, I know that because I could feel the meaning of the dream as it was happening and after it was happening. Now my dreams continue, I am not sure any one else’s do as such, but mine do. I will have a dream, good or bad and once it’s ended it will continue to an after part and I don’t mean that the story will continue, I mean it will be I woke up from my dream within my dream and life will go on and I will have my dream knowledge in my dream as I continue another. I know that sounds confusing.
My dream was about my ex as most of mine are because of his strong connection to my soul. I know this sounds weird and most perceive it as, “your just not over him,” but I am and I know exactly what it is. I have, from the moment I felt his energy, known something. Something of the strength that twines its way around us. Now this connection is only given strength through acceptance. As human beings we must understand the powers of energy in this world, good or bad. We all send out energy and there are other energy’s that come towards us that we attract, good or bad and it is in our choices and acceptance of these energy’s that we choose to let in that give them power. Okay, so my ex has always had a strong energy, I can sense him. I can feel when he thinks of me, or speaks of me. I can feel when he’s about to write or text me, I know because I have even tested this theory. Even in times when I feel his anger towards me and he has a thought of, “I am not going to talk to her again” the anger settles and I feel him thinking to try again. I hope I’m making sense here. “come on Mandie, get to the point already!” ha!
So my dream was a warning about my ex and it isn’t always as it shows me in the images, that is something I have come to understand from the many years I have lived. “There I go talking like I’m a thousand years old again.” ha!
In this dream I perceive as bad, only because the energy of it was a warning, but that could also be perceived as good as can many things. “Man! will this story ever come out?”
I was letting my ex visit his son as I normally do and he was being nice as he usually tries to act as in person. “ACT” Okay, so he asked me if he could take his son out for lunch or get milk or something, I can’t quite remember what it was for, but for some reason his nice behavior made me say yes. So I got him ready and I let him take him out for an hour at the most he said. It was early, around lunch time when he left with him and I went about my day until about 3. That’s when I got this bad feeling in the pit of my stomach which let me know that my ex had made a decision to cross me. Cross me, meaning, “go against me.” Dishonor my wishes if I may.
I called him and I asked him why he wasn’t back yet and he started talking nasty to me, saying he was going to keep him and cross the border and it was his turn. I became upset as I would and I started crying and pleading with him on the phone which he found amusing and i could feel his thoughts and feelings of, “Now I have the power” Which told me he thinks of me as “having the power of the situation” Which is totally true since he’s actually said to me things as such. I threatened him over the phone at first and it didn’t work, he wasn’t afraid of what I said and so I pleaded and begged I would do anything if he would just bring him home. He hung up on me and I started walking back home, which was the last apartment building where I had lived which was odd to me because I don’t live there no more and then I realized it was because that was the place where all the arguments in our relationship were. That is like the core of the dream, so that tells me that this dream was a past. What he used to think and feel towards me. Wanting power over me and enjoying it and getting back at me. That, is a bad energy that I accepted into my life. Okay so that part of my dream showed me the past.
The dream ended and I was with my family and it was the present, because I was moving into my new apartment I am now, but I wasn’t in it yet. My ex was there, only he was at a family gathering with me, unexpectedly of course. My dad made dinner for everyone and I had a chicken burger and was eating it. My ex looked at me and insulted me, telling me not to eat the way i was, I wont say the insult, but lets just leave it as. He insulted the way I ate and told me not to do it because it was embarrassing for him.
So this tells me, in the present. That he wants to be accepted by the people around me and that he is embarrassed by me and does not have caring for me at all. Does not care if my feelings are hurt, only that he is perceived as the “good guy” and the guy I let get away.
This dream to me was a warning in a sense that it does not want me to allow this energy to fallow me to my new place, that’s why it did not show me the future in it. It is saying… there is a bad energy here with this person in my life and I must always be careful not to accept it. In the present part of the dream I walked away from his insult and shrugged it off and didn’t allow it to upset me and he walked after me continuing to press the insult in and for me to become affected by it, but I wasn’t. it was just so “OLD” to me.
I hope this makes sense.
Also at the end of the dream I was away from him and he was watching me from a distance and I knew he was, but I ignored it. I was writing on my face book that I had a bad dream and then I wrote a blog about it and I was having trouble writing it because my mind kept going blank as to how to write it and what to say, to be respectful in my writing. Not give out names etc and when I was writing, “I had a bad dream about…” and stopped to think, my ex looked to me and all of a sudden he was right in front of me, his face right there with this cocky smirk. “What was your dream about?” but he said it in a sarcastic kind of way, like he was toying with me and already knew what I was going to write and what it was about., but I didn’t care. I didn’t make a big deal over that he knew things like I did before they happened type thing, like I used to. I was kinda like, “What ever..”
Then I woke up.
I guess I passed the dream testing.