Does anyone notice
Notice the scars hidden in every inch of every wrinkle that stains my face
Does anyone see the pain in my eyes when they look at me, or hear the cries of struggle, through my hand to hand microphone to heaven that echoes loudly.
The sound of my body crashing to the kitchen floor, my face buried in my hands, cupping my tears that fill quickly, while memories flood my vision in understanding what has come to pass and what has passed and come to my attention.
Is there a cure for this heart ache I feel?
I have moments of silent stillness after praying and asking the Lord for strength, love and comfort and he grants me sleep and I awake to the morning where it begins again.
Will things change and will it be for the better or for the worst or will I drift far away and have to start all over again with a missing part of myself I was forced to leave behind. Will I ever see what I saw in the eyes of my love again. Will they see me again, the way they once did, and touch me the same and kiss me the same and hold me the same. Was it as I remember, was it even them or was it something driving them. My confusion makes me numb.
Does anyone know the heart ache I feel and the struggle.
Does anyone feel the wounds that bind me in my rippling lips.
It is only me and heaven who are my companions in this sail, through open water of biting sharks
There is only us
Will this storm ever pass and when it has, what will be left from it
What will be left of me?
Follow the wrinkles that outline my face, maybe it is a map
maybe it leads to heaven, or maybe it tells my tale of hell
What of my anger that fights it’s way beneath my skin and claws at the walls of the shower of rain
Where is my comfort when my body grows too weak to stand and causes my crash to the sea of ground beneath me
There is no time to rest
There is no time to pick myself up from this truth that clouds me in storm
There is no time to breathe and no time to greive the mourning of passing
There is no time, so this time I bleed
I bleed in cries that down my face
I bleed in sadness, it stains my cheeks
I bleed in silence and bleed in pleas
I bleed in anger and bleed in shouts
I bleed in sleep and dreams stop haunting
Day is my nightmare, so dream is my heaven
Sleep keeps me safe, but not much of it I have
How much I rise when my body and soul is pulled
Who will carry my body when I grow too weak?
Lord cradle my frame and keep me safe from harm
I cry to the heavens
I light a candle
I whisper quietly